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Location: North Avenue, Baltimore,...

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Location: North Avenue, Baltimore, MD
Rating: 4.2/5
Description: OK Baltimore, I need you to explain something to me… If I wanted to buy a house in Midtown or Charles Village I’d basically have to sell a kidney and then a few more off of the homeless dude living in my alley, but if I want to buy a place two blocks from both of those neighborhoods on North Ave, I only need to skip lunch. 

This goes with my theory of Baltimore, which is no matter how nice of a neighborhood you’re in you’re only two blocks away from your impending doom. This was of course done by design by the creators of Baltimore, who wished to cull out the weak from Baltimore’s population and send them to the burbs. Sure, it might not sounds like a good idea since Baltimore had 50 years of population loss, but in our defense - THEY WERE ALL PUSSIES.

I’m sorry we didn’t do more to keep the Bed Bath and Beyond crowd (and Home Depot, but only if there’s time… only if there’s time…) but now we are growing in population again and as a city we are spared from the shitty conversations about which TGI Friday’s is the “good” one. Fuck yeah Baltimore!


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