Location: Starbucks, Eutaw and Baltimore St, Baltimore, MD
Rating: 2.2/5
Description: I can hear the conversation this couple had in their Howard County McMansion that morning:
“Honey, I was thinking that after I diversify my retirement portfolio and drop the kids off at gymnastics, you and I could drive into Lexington Market and shoot an eightball of this amazing east Baltimore scramble I’ve been reading about, and then maybe catch up on some reading at the local Starbucks?”
“That sounds great dear, just don’t forget we have a meeting with your tax accountant at six so bring a clean pair of underwear in case you poop yourself again.”
Maybe it wasn’t exactly like that, I mean their kid could be into karate or something, but you get my point. I can’t in good conscious give these two a high score, there is nothing hardcore about passing out in a Starbucks unless it’s from exhaustion after banging the barista in the bathroom. The submitter gave some extra details which kept the rating up there, but even their caption wrote these two off as Cadillac Crackheads:
…as we left she woke up and snorted something so inconspicuously from a coned napkin while her beau hunched away. High class addicts that spend money on their caffeine addiction and heroin at the same time.